HOW DO I SHOW MY BOYFRIEND THAT I THINK HE'S SPECIAL WITHOUT SCARING HIM OFF??? COLTON, HELP!!!!!

QUESTION: 

It is my first time having a boyfriend in a very long time, and we’ve been together for 6 months. I want to show him that he is special to me without scaring him off. What should I do??

ANSWER:

First off, I need to point out to you that there MUST be something that he is doing that is making YOU feel special. It is okay, you can blush. First ask yourself what does he do, in particular that is different from your past boyfriends? Is it just the chemistry that you two have? Does he talk to you in a way that makes you melt? To be honest, guys are more emotional than you think. For him to make the effort to woo you (even if it is subconscious) it means that he likes you.

To show him that you fancy him, show him that you pay attention to him. What is his favorite sports team? Who does he admire? What are some of his life goals/dreams (if he has none, break up with him immediately)? Let him know that you know these things! Talk to him about his inner feelings, without pushing it on him. Talk to him about some of his fears, without scaring him. Talk to him about his thoughts, without invading his space. Show him that you are interested in him, without seeming like a stalker. Maintain a balance. Showing him that you care about him will make him realize that you are a very special girl that he will not want to lose.

Small things matter most. Make him breakfast in bed and when he asks “Why?” respond with “Just because.” I don’t know if you and your boyfriend have made love yet, but if you have, or if you’re ready to, run his bath water, which has you in it (bubble bath and candles are optional). Bathing with your boyfriend is very romantic, and it is a very intimate setting. Go for a private walk, and just talk, which is a perfect time for you to ask those pivotal questions that let him open up with you. It is hard for guys to open up emotionally, but when guided just right they become emotionally attached to the people that helped them. It is “security blanket” if you will. If he considers you “special” he won’t have a hard time letting you know what’s on his mind.

If you think he is special let him know some of your thoughts but not everything. Giving a guy your brain in its entirety is what scares him away (that’s the secret). Men (including myself) like mystery and a challenge. In Halle Berry’s Reveal perfume advertisement she says “Every woman should keep a little something to herself… Reveal some things, not everything.” What I am saying is keep a little mystery to yourself until you are 100% sure he is “The One” and you can trust him 100%. Also, unless he is a man that is attracted by aggressive women, tone it down. And don’t scare him by being too emotional.

Hopefully, you make an impression that lets him know that you think he is special without creeping him out. Remember: He already thinks you’re special, Show him that you notice him and you’re interested in getting to know him more, and maintain mystery! Good Luck!