Q: Colton, I am from a small town where I have plenty of family, friends, and a boyfriend. But I also have dreams and goals that I want to accomplish, and I don’t think that it is here in my hometown. I only have one year and I will be finished with school. How do I obtain success, and maintain healthy relationships at the same time??
A: This is something I know all too well. First off, it is excellent that you are getting an education. Be proud of yourself for that. It is going to be one of your biggest assets when you are on the road to success. Which brings me to my first piece of advice: Know your self worth and your best assets and talents. It’s very easy for friends and family to downsize your worth, because they secretly want you to be down in a rut like them or it may be because they want you to stay with them; just because they are family and friends do not mean they do not have ill wills. Like they say “misery loves company,” and it truly does. Do NOT allow anyone to diminish your self worth. Always have the mind frame “I deserve better” until you achieve better.
Eliminate anyone who doesn’t support you, or at least make distance. Family, friends, and your boyfriend should support your decisions, which is to move out of state and pursue your career. I always say “I originate from my mother’s womb but that doesn’t mean that I will stay there forever.” That means just because you are from somewhere doesn’t mean that you must stay there your whole life. Which leads to my next piece of advice: Take risks.
Life is too short to play it safe all the time. If you play it safe you will always have that question “What if..?” in the back of your mind. If there’s something that you want to do, unless it’s a crime or sin, DO IT! It might be a bad decision, but at least you know that it was not meant to be. Remember: “Always a lesson, never a failure.” And if making this risk makes you a millionaire, make sure you keep in touch, so you can send me a check. Ha, really though, you should only take risks that your heart is in. if your heart and head are conflicting, make your decision based on this question: if you had to choose would you rather have happiness or survival? If your answer is happiness, go with your heart, if your answer is survival, go with your head. (Even though you choose happiness doesn’t mean you can have survival too.)
Wherever you go though, you’ll expand your horizon, make new networks, and best of all: MAKE NEW FRIENDS. Also, if you go somewhere like a city such as Houston, Atlanta, NYC, LA, Chicago, etc. the convenience is amazing. Small towns do not offer that. Opportunity is also in abundance in these large cities, which small towns just do not provide. However, where there is opportunity there is competition, which is the con of a big city. Make sure you are well qualified before making a big step. Hard work, dedication, and ambition together will make you a great candidate for whatever you want to do in life. (Did you notice that hard work was first in that list?)
Good luck on your HUGE transition and I know you can make it!
Before I moved across the country there was a song that motivated me to leave: “Monday Morning” by Melanie Fiona. Give it a listen.
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